Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
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