You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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