She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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