she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
