Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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