He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
