yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
