pop tarts are not kleenex
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
