return my video game
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize