I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
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