Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He? As in you personified your dick?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
