Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
