he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
