My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize