I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
