Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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