He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
You know, be my cock's hype man.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
