best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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