i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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