the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
