I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
