u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
