I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
