Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
