The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
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