Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
