you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Randomize
