I'm drive I can fine osifer
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
my sisters under your porch take her home
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
