Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
