Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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