You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
