Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize