Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
This baby is an asshole
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Randomize
