I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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