we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
