I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
