The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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