i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Randomize
