Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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