We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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