i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
