everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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