One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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