Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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