it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
