You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
accomplished twins. life is a go
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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