Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Drunk is a universal language darling
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