Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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