Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Ketchup is God's man juice
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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