Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
