if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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